Its #MindfulMonday again and this week is a very special Monday for me as I have just returned from Dzogchen Beara in West Cork, where I have been on a meditation retreat for the weekend with Sogyal Rinpoche. Rinpoche is a world-renowned Buddhist teacher from Tibet, and author of the highly acclaimed The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying which I read when my dad passed away and it helped me to make sense of my grief and it also helped me to heal and understand the human condition better.
I have been working really hard and I really needed a weekend of meditation and teachings. I now know when I’m entering what I call the danger zone and warning lights come on letting me know that I need to act to prevent myself slipping bad to my old ways and into a world of anxiety and depression. Over the years this has become increasingly easier as I get to know myself better and become more comfortable in my own skin.
My old way of dealing with these issues was very simply to go out and drink my head off leaving me with the “fear” the next day along with some free gifts of depression and anxiety. After 20 years that became frustrating and incredibly boring and its nearly a year now since I’ve had a drink and let me tell you it’s a very different world.
I’ve been making changes very slowly during the past few years, which is the only way they become part of your daily life. Making too many big changes quickly usually leads to a feeling of frustration as you try to keep up and then end up disappointed when you can’t keep up and revert back to your old ways.
What we need to remember is bad habits took years to develop and they will take quite a considerable amount of time to break.
I went looking for something this weekend, answers to problems and daily frustrations but what actually happened was that I left something behind and I’m glad I did. I was desperately trying to get rid of my negative thoughts, tiredness and patterns that just don’t serve me anymore.
We are all constantly changing and I was reminded yet again this weekend to be kinder to myself and to understand that as a human being as I evolve and grow I will reach hurdles and obstacles but as long as I’m willing to work through them I have the incredible opportunity to really learn and grow. I was reminded once again that happiness is an inside job but a job well worth putting the effort into.
So this week be kind to yourself and take time to just be in the moment. It’s these small changes that will move you forward to becoming the most complete you that you can be.